too bad you live with your parents still
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
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