Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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