Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
