PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
