PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
