I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
