You made me cry and you don't even care
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
