Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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