I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
