i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
