I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Randomize
