Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
