She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Randomize
