my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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