party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
