Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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