u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
