Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
