Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
