you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
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