I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
