You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
