What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
We need to rekindle our bromance
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
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