i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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