Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
