Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He passed out mid-signature
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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