I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
