O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
