then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
