Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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