Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
