He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
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