im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
