Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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