just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
