I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
bring money and cleavage
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
