I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize