oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize