just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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