do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize