Whod you bang
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
