I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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