batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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