please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
