I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
