she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
