Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
