we're blogging at a bar
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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