I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
