My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Randomize
